W: put your socks on.
I: you didn’t say the magic word.
W: please put your socks on.
I: that’s not the magic word!
W: it isn’t? Then what is?
I: the naked bird has landed!
W: the naked bird has landed and he wants you to put your socks on.
I: okay mommy. I’ll put my socks on.
W: thank you!
————
Izzy: Mommy please give me another purple nightmare. I promise I won’t go bonkers!
————-
W: why are you being so naughty?
I: I have naughty things in my head.
W: …
W: (deep breath)
W: we all have naughty thoughts in our heads, but that doesn’t mean we should act on them. That’s called impulse control. Give it a try.
I: okay mommy.
————
I: Mormons come from space
W: pardon me?
I: Mormons! They come from space
W: Mormons?
I: yes! Mormons come from space.
W:….
I: here. Do you want some Mormon goo? (she handed me several strings of silver Mardi Gras bead)
I: eat it! Mormon goo from space is delicious!
–I finally realized that Mormons = Martians.
